Pranks for the Memories transcript
Prologue: The theme song intro Male Robotic Voices: The Simpsons Clancy: back with a brand new 30th season Simpsons Theme Music Playing In Background Jimbo and Kearney saw off the head of the Jebediah Springfield statue in front of the town square, and the head falls off on Ralph, about to eat an ice cream treat. Ralph: AAAAAAH! The scene goes over to Springfield Elementary School, where Bart is writing I will not horse around in class 13 times, then the school bell rings, and he gets outta school on his skateboard, and lands right into a pile of leaves Groundskeeper Willie had just finished raking up. Bart jumps right outta the leaf pile and Barney shows up. Barney: Lightly The next scene goes over to Homer getting ready to head back home with a uranium bar stuck on his back. In the background, Lenny and Carl are putting up the number 3 over the number 2 on a sign that says Days Without An Accident. However, they both fall off the ladder. Whistle Sound Marge, Maggie, Patty and Selma are checking out with the groceries. The items on the conveyor belt include Tomacco juice and Mr. Sparkle power clean detergent. A box of Krusty-O's is scanned, and the total amount on the register changes from $236.60to $243.26, which means the price of the cereal is $6.66. Maggie is mistakenly scanned too, which doubles the register total to $486.52, and she is mistakenly packaged with the groceries. Marge looks mildly concerned but smiles just as Maggie pops outta the bag. Maggie sees Baby Gerald and angrily shakes her right fist at him just as Gerald does the exact same. During Dewey Largo's music class, more characters are shown in the orchestra. Recognizable characters include Wendell, Database, Martin, Jessica, Richard, Lewis, Janey, Milhouse, Sherri and Terri. [Lisa Playing Intro On Saxophone] Right after Homer discards the uranium bar, it lands on Otto. Otto, not knowing what it is, eats it. Bart skateboards by and turns the corner with a muted whoosh. He skateboards past Sideshow Bob, Helen, Apu and his octuplets, Moe, Comic Book Guy, Disco Stu, Crazy Cat Lady and Chief Wiggum, who waves his night stick. Hans Moleman peeks outta the sewers in the middle of the street, but Marge's car slams it shut just as it passes by. Clang! Abe is seen in the passenger seat with Maggie in the middle. Horn Honking Homer is standing by the garage, and Lisa scoots by past him on her bicycle. Homer: "D'oh!" The other car pulls up...... Homer: WAAAAAAAAAH! Homer runs around into the garage for safety. Bart, Lisa, Maggie, Marge and Homer are about to sit on the sofa, but Peter Griffin's sitting there. Music Ends Scene 1: The Simpson family's house Marge: "Okay, everybody, he should be here any single minute soon." Bart: "Who's coming today this time?" Homer: "Your cousin, Colby Powell's coming over here to visit this morning." Lisa: "Oh yeah, he's the 1 with the jokes and pranks and everything, which I can't stand to see him do." Bart: "Neither can I." Marge: "Now, kids, he might be the master of jokes and pranks, but don't play any back at him." Homer: "At his age of being 16 years old is the final thing you'll ever do around here." Ringing Marge: "Oh my gosh, that must be him right now." Lisa opens the door to let Colby inside. Colby: "Hey, Bart, Lisa, Maggie, my 3 most favorite cousins, how's it going?" Lisa: "Pretty good, Colby, how are things going with you by the way?" Colby: "Pretty good as well." Marge: "So, Colby, what have you been doing, lately?" Colby: "Oh just the usual things, Aunt Marge and Uncle Homer, arcade video game playing, collecting action figures, trading cards and bobble heads, reading teen magazines and watching PG 13 rated movies as well." Homer: "Well, Colby, it looks like you're living the young teen life ahead of you." Meanwhile in the dining room, Bart takes his seat at the dining room table and something unexpected happens. Cushion Deflating Bart: "Hey, who put this whoopee cushion on my most favorite dining chair?" Lisa: "Well don't look at me, Bart, I didn't do it." Maggie: (removing her red pacifier from her mouth) "Me neither." Colby: "I got you good this time, Bart, I got you good." Bart: "I'm going to the living room to watch Itchy and Scratchy on television." Bart goes right over to the living room, sits right on the sofa and turns on the television screen. Pig Pen: "Hey, kids of all ages, it's time for The Itchy and Scratchy Show with a brand new episode." Chipmunk Like Voices: They fight and bite they fight and bite and bite fight, fight, fight bite, bite, bite The Itchy and Scratchy Show The episode title on the television screen reads: Pranks a Bunch Itchy is setting the dining room table and Scratchy sits right down at it. Itchy: "Ready, Poochie?" Poochie: "Ready, Itchy." Itchy and Poochie go right up to Scratchy and Itchy places a lighted match right near Scratchy's place. Scratchy: "Well finally, now to keep nice and warm." Scratchy places his hands right near the fire flames, but suddenly burns up. Scratchy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Bart and Lisa: Uncontrollably Bart: "Hey, this just gives me an idea, I'll bring out the whoopee cushion and snake in a jar pranks." Bart walks around and notices a green jar sitting right on the dining room table. Colby: "Go ahead, Bart, take 1 peanut brittle." Bart: "Don't mind if I do, Colby." Bart opens up the green jar and a red rubber snake jumps right out of it. Bart: "Whoooooooa!" Colby: "Got you good again." Bart: "Alright, this time, it's getting personal." Later that eveing, Bart prepares the whoopee cushion and snake in a jar pranks for Colby. Bart: "This is gonna be super good." Meanwhile when the Simpson family members are enjoying their dinner meals....... Bart places the blue whoopee cushion on Colby's chair. Approaching Bart: "Don't tell this to Mom and Dad, Lisa, here comes Colby right now." Colby arrives to the dining room. Bart: "Colby, you're here, take your seat." Colby: "Don't mind if I do, Bart." Colby takes his seat in his dining chair. Whoopee Cushion Deflating Colby: "He had to do 1 back at me." Lisa: "Oh, Bart, 1 of those days you're gonna get it." Later right after their dinner meals, Bart grabs the purple jar with the peanut brittle sticker that he stuck on there and sneaks right up to Colby in the living room. Bart: "Hey, Colby, would you care for some peanut brittle?" Colby: "Why sure, Bart, don't mind if I do." Colby opens the purple jar and a blue rubber snake jumps right out of it. Colby: "Whoa, yikes!" Bart: "I got you good again." Lisa: "Bart, you're gonna be in super big trouble when Mom and Dad find out about this!" Homer (from inside the kitchen): "Bart, get over here right this instant!" Lisa: "Oh my word, Bart, now you've done it." Fade to another black screen......... Fox Network Announcer: "Don't go away, The Simpsons will be right back, right after these commercial breaks." Commercial Break Number 1 Commercial Break Number 2 Fox Network Announcer: "And now, back to The Simpsons, on Fox Network." The kitchen Colby: "I'm telling you, he was playing those jokes and pranks on me, he said that he got me good this time." Bart: "It's just not fair, Mom and Dad, Colby was just being plain old annoying with his jokes and pranks, so I did some back at him." Lisa: "I never realized he could do that." Marge: "Bartholemew Jojo Simpson, you pushed it way too far with the jokes and pranks you played on Colby this evening, and for that, you're grounded for another week." Homer: "And that Itchy and Scratchy video game you were planning to get this weekend, forget about it." Bart: "What? you guys can't do this to me!" Lisa: "Mom and Dad are absolutely right, Bart, what you did to our cousin wasn't a super good idea." Colby: "Is something the matter here?" Marge: "We're terribly sorry about Bart's personal behavior, Colby." Homer: "But what he did was unacceptable." Colby: "Oh that's alright, it won't happen again." Category:Season 30 transcripts